His Relationships

Isolation is not healthy. We all need the influence of good people to keep us on the right path. Every married couple should have at least two strong believing couples with whom they can share encouragement, strength, and the richness of their lives. Being around such people is edifying, enriching, balancing, and fulfilling, and it helps us keep persepective when things seem to grow out of proportion. Having the positive qualities of other people rub off on us is the best thing for a marriage.
      I remember one time when Michael and I had an argument just before we were to be at another couple's house for dinner. On the drive there we sat in stiffened silence, and all I could think about was how we could possibly get through the evening gracefully without making the other couple very uncomfortable. When we arrived, the warmth, love, and rich godliness we felt from them infected our thoughts and emotions. Soon we were laughing and talking and having a great time, forgetting about what had transpired previously. What those two people had was not just a " let the good times roll" party spirit. It was the joy of the Lord, and it wore off on us.
      We've witnessed the exact same thing happen in reverse. There have been numerous instances when a couple in the midst of maritial strife came to our house for dinner and went away with peace in their hearts. One particular couple even called just before they were to arrive--when the dinner was completely ready--to say they'd just had a bad argument and couldn't possibly be enjoyable guests. I told them we completely understood, having experienced the same thing ourselves, but that we wanted them to come, even if they sat in silence all night. " Besides, you do need to eat," I said. " If necessary you can sit at opposite ends of the table." It took some persuading, but they came and it turned out to be a highly enjoyable evening for all. We even ended up laughing about what transpired earlier and they left hand and hand.
      Being good friends with godly people who love the Lord doesn't just happen by chance. We must pray that such people will come into our lives. And then when we find them, we should continue to cover the relationships in prayer. We should also pray the bad influences awa. The Bible says we must " not be unequally yoked together with unbelivers" ( 2 Corinthians 6:14). This doesn't mean we can never be around anyone who isn't a Christian, but our closet, most influential relationships should be with people who know and love the Lord, or there will be consequences. " The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray." ( Proverbs 12:26). That's why it's very important to have a church home where it's possible to meet the kind of people you need. Choose to be around the highest quality people you can, the ones whose hearts are aimed toward God.
       Pray also for your husband to have godly male friends. And when he finds them, give time to be with them without criticism. Those friends will refine him. " As iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens the countenance of his friend." ( Proverbs 27:17). They will be a good influence. " Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man's friend does so by hearty councel." ( Proverbs 27:9) Of course if it becomes obsessive, pray for balance.
       After we had children, Michael worked every day and night during the week and on weekends he spent spare time on the golf course or at baseball and football games with his friends. There were many bitter arguments about that, but no changes happened until I started praying that God would convict him and turn his heart toward home. God did a much better job that I ever could have.
      Often men have fewer close friends than women because of the way their time is consumed with establishing their careers. They don't take the necessary steps to develop close friendships like we do. That's where prayer can make a difference. Even if your husband is not a believer, you can still pray for him to have godly friends. A close friend of mine has a husband who doesn't follow the Lord and we have prayed many times for him to have godly friends and be in contact with believers where he works. God has now brought so many strong Christians into his life that we  laugh about how the Lord has him surrounded.
     Pray about all of your husband's relationships. He needs to have good relationships with his parents, brotehrs, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, co-workers, and neighbors. Pray that none of his relationships be marred by his inability to forgive. A husband who is tortured with unforgiveness is not a pretty sight.

Prayer:

Lord, I pray for ( husband's name) to have good, godly male friends with whom he can openly share his heart. May they be trustworthy men of wisdom who will speak truth into his life and not just say what he wants to hear ( Proverbs 28:23). Give him the discernment to separate himself from anyone who will not be a good influence ( 1 Corinthians 5:13). Show him the importance of godly friendships and help me encourage him to sustain them. Give us believing married couples whom we can feel comfortable sharing our lives.
     I pray for strong, peaceful relationships with each of his family members, neighbors, acquaintances, and coworkers. Today I specificall pray for his relationship with ( Name of Person). Inspire open communication and mutual acceptance between them. Let there be reconcilliation where there has been estrangement. Work peace into anything that needs to be worked out.
      I pray that in his heart he will honor his father and mother so that he will live long and blessed in his life ( Exodus 20:12). Enable him to be a forgiving person and not to carry grudges or hold things in his heart against others. Lord, You've said in Your Word that " he who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes" ( 1 John 2:11). I pray that my husband would never be blinded by the darkness of unforgiveness, but continually walk in the light of forgiveness. May he not judge or show contempt for anyone but remember that " we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ" ( Romans 14:10). Enable him to love his enemies, bless those who curse him, do good to those who hate him, and pray for those who spitefully use him and persecute him ( Matthew 5:44). I pray that I will be counted as his best friend and that our friendship with one another will continue to grow. SHow him what it means to be a true friend and enable him to be one.

Power Tools:

Let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is themanner of some, but exhorting one another. ( Hebrews 10:24,25)

If you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. ( Matthew 5:23,24)

If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another. ( 1 John 1:7)

Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, " I repent," you shall forgive him. ( Luke 17:3,4)

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this you will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another. ( John 13:34,35)